I’m done with finals. I’m essentially done with school. I’m THIS close to being an alum of Brigham Young University.

Just so you know. This blog is gonna experience an amazing jump in posts. I’m quite excited.

I am a spazz. A total, utter, complete spazz. How I manage to be a functional adult most of the time is totally beyond me. The problem is that occasionally this leads to people underestimating me. That ticks me off, and it riles me into action. This action will restore my reputation, or strengthen it, and then I can go back to being my usual mellow, slightly spazzed out self.

I’m a nice person, with a sweet personality, but I will BITE you if you get in my way.

The other new thing I’m doing is oomphing up the health aspect of my life. I haven’t really wanted to talk about it, because I’m afraid that if i mention it too much I’ll lose steam, and sort of give it up.

I’m motivated by two competing factors, the first is that I’m sick of being fat, and the second is that I really don’t want to be this heavy when I move to New York. I think that I’m approaching the stage in life where I feel like I just want to be me, exactly as I am. I don’t want to lose weight to conform to a look (the fit BYU coed, perfectly primed for marriage, for example), or to anyone else’s concept of what I should be. But at the same time, I’ve realized lately, that what I have always envisioned myself to be is not matching up with the person in the mirror. I was working out last night, and I could see my reflection, and it was just not what I have in mind for what I am, and what I want to be.

There comes a time in everyone’s lives, when it hurts more to stay where you are than it does to change, and I think I’m at that point. So I’m changing – and for the better, I belive.

I know, I know. In order to have an interesting blog, you’ve got to keep posting. It’s only been a few days, but it feels like I haven’t said anything in forever. It’s because my life is so full of stupid things right now, that I’m fairly sure none of you actually want to hear it.

I’m heading into the storm of finals, and I’ve got lots of dull projects to complete. I’m not dating anyone, I’m not interested in anyone, and work is going just fine. It’s all fairly dull. The only things that are vaguely interesting, are ones that pertain pretty much to me, and me only.

For one, my obsession with New York City grows daily. I know, everyone tells me I’m in for a let down. But I love this place – I feel like it has a certain connection to who I am. That’s just flat out cheesy, and I know it. But let me back this up a little and give you the facts:

I love:

Art  – do I even need to say anything else?
Fashion – ditto.
Asia – Short of moving back to Beijing, Chinatown is a good place to start.
Good food – ditto
Publishing (books and magazines) – I feel like words are practically synonymous with NYC.
Culture & Flavor – I really enjoy Provo, I do. I’ve grown to appreciate how good life can be here. But it’s a heck of a lot more salt than pepper.

It just boils down to this, whenever I leave New York after visiting, I’m incredibly sad. I’m open to the concept that I may hate it, it could totally kick my trash. But I have to at least try it. I have to give it a shot, or I’ll regret it the rest of my life.

I know none of this is original, or even marginally interesting, but there it is. It’s my blog. I’ll write what I want. And today, I’m thinking about New York.

When we were kids, and it was cold outside, we’d out to the street to find a jianbing(煎饼) vendor. For 1 kuai qian, my siblings and I could buy a piping hot crepe with egg, savory sauce, chili and a crunchy thing (no one seems to know what it is) all folded into a hot folded square of yum. Chere and I would sit on the corner, and pull at the layers of crepe delicately, trying not to burn our fingers. Chere would avoid the spicy parts, whereas I would savor the zing on my tongue. Seth would ask for extra spice, and then run even further down the street to buy 10 lamb kebabs  (羊肉串) that would inevitably give him the hershy squirts.

This week, I’ve been thinking about China a lot.