“These people are like… a suburb built on a landfill. They’re normal and wholesome, until you dig, you know? Then you find out there’s garbage underneath. I mean, every once in a while, amidst the baby diapers and lettuce, you find an antique chair or some gold. So you get excited and maybe you keep digging. But really, you’re just as likely to find a 30 year-old deer carcass as you are some amazing treasure. It all depends on how motivated you are. But hey, I’m optimistic, if you dig deep enough, there could be ore deposits, or whatever. But it’s not particularly stable, you know? You just don’t know where you stand with these people. The piles of dirt could collapse on you, and besides, you lose your bearings – compasses don’t seem like they’d really work in landfills.”

Shane: “So, Tai, are you dating? Are you on the market?”

Me: “On the market, yes. In the clearance aisle.”

Mood: Cheeky.

First words out of my mouth this morning: “How you doin’?” Carlyn is sick.

Considering: Investing in some more furniture – our house is a bit bare. Also, blue nail polish. Well, turquoise. I keep trying other colors, red, pink, purple, and right now, white – which frankly, makes me look like I’ve been messing around with office supplies. But I love me some turquoise blue.

Coming up this weekend: John is coming into town with Shane!!!! So excited. And I’m going to Spark. It’s going to be a crazy weekend, and I sometimes wish I could clone myself and squeeze a few more things in. Sunday, peeps are coming over for dinner – in our continued attempts to Better Know A Ward (this is a riff on Stephen Colbert’s Better Know A District, and frankly, the fact that I had to explain it kind of ruined it.) Chicken and dumplings, layered salad and walnut bread are on the menu. OH! and bananas foster for dessert.

Self Improvement: I’m tempted to say that I need to get to bed earlier, but honestly, sometimes you have to stay up late just to see what happens.

Materialism: I want a real couch. I real, comfy, non-futon couch. And, even though we swore off TV, I wish that we had a TV so that I could snuggle into the aforesaid comfy couch and watch a funny movie on one of these cold nights. Here’s the thing with TV: I love it. I didn’t grow up watching television, and as a result, I find it incredibly alluring and fascinating – and all the channels…my gosh. So many options! Anyway – I made an executive decision that I wanted a life more than I wanted to watch Seinfeld re-runs, and banned television in the house. Carlyn doesn’t even want a microwave, so no problems there. But these nights when it’s cold outside, and we have our twinkle lights on, and the house is all glowy – I think it would be nice to curl up and watch a good movie.

This is the couch I want. Every time I go into Anthropolgie, I find it and sit on it to remind myself. It doesn’t look that comfy, but it is!

I dreamed: I’m not really sure. But I woke up happy, so it had to have been good.

Last thing I ate: was really boring. Note: You wouldn’t think that BBQ sauce would go on eggs, but it does.

Last thing I cooked: I left work last night determined to make apple dumplings and bread. The apple dumplings turned out well, and are completely gone. But the whole wheat rolls turned out looking like little turds – the recipe needs more yeast.

What I want to cook next: I have left over BBQ sauce from some chicken I made on Sunday, and I’m trying to think what I’m going to do with it. I might make pulled pork sandwiches. My mother sent me a recipe for coleslaw today that involves pomegranate seeds (love!), so I might make a pseudo Southern meal out of it.

Listening to: Radiohead, Coblie Caillat, Nickel Creek (When You Come Back Down – on repeat), Jay-Z, and Kelly Clarkson. I know – it’s a weird mix.

Reading: Nothing. I’m in Mosiah in my scripture reading, but honestly, I haven’t even cracked Vogue this month. I read a few articles in this week’s NYMagazine last night, when I was waiting for a phone call, but that was it. LAME.

Design Blogs: Creature Comforts, Design Dust, I love this inspiration board at Harvey Faircloth.

What I’m wearing: Black hoodie (I’ve GOT to buy some winter clothes), blue tank top, black slacks, sneakers. I’m looking a little haggard today – and my eyebrow keeps twitching.

Song of the Day: So, I don’t know if you guys know who Patty Griffin is. If you do, kudos. If you don’t… well, hey: you’re welcome. I deliberately chose a live version of this song (Let Him Fly), even though it’s a little choppy and cuts off at the end, because I love live performances.

Picture of the day: Guess what’s coming? CHRISTMAS! P.S. I took this picture at Tai Pan Trading. Hah.

So this is what I think about Halloween:

1. It’s one big opportunity to break out the false eyelashes, glitter and fake tattoos. Yes, I’m going as David Bowie. Kidding.

2. I think people who don’t dress up are… kind of boring. Steve, are you listening? Such a poop head. You think you’re too cool, but really, it just means you’re afraid to let loose.

3. Guys should either be totally hilarious or dress like firemen.  TRUST me on the fireman thing. Trust me.

4. Girls – go with cute or clever. The whole sexy costume thing just makes you look desperate. And tails are never a good idea.

5. Use spandex very judiciously. Maybe never.

6. Don’t dress like Jack Sparrow or Edward Cullen. Johnny Depp and whatsisface would never dress like Jack Sparrow or Edward Cullen.

7. If you have to be a superhero – Batman is hot, Superman means you’re full of yourself, and Spiderman means you’re still 5, and you probably match your bedsheets.

8. Bumblebee outfits are the universal costume – they are adorable on babies, cute on girls, and hilarious on men. I can respect a man in a bumblebee outfit.

9. Fake blood is always a good idea.

10. Give out good candy. Forget the sweet tarts – give out snickers.

11. Wear shoes you can walk in, and an outfit you’re not afraid to sweat in. Halloween tends to be a long night, and you don’t want to realize halfway through the night that the silky hippie top you bought at the thrift store and didn’t wash is suddenly reeking with the added moisture. Polyester is not always your friend.

12. Wigs take commitment. They get hot and sweaty and slip and slide. But they are awesome.

13. If you wear wings – watch where you swing ‘em. Don’t jab people on the dance floor. It invades their bubble. On the other hand, it’s a good way to make friends.

14. Be wary of props. A scythe is marvelously menacing, but how you gonna get your groove on with that thang? Same goes for mermaid tails and fake muscles.

15. If it takes longer than a sentence to explain your costume, fail.

16. (Caveat to 15) Dressing up as something awesome but obscure, like say… Buster from Arrested Development is a good way to find people at the party who have equally good taste in TV shows. But be prepared to be disappointed – there’s a reason the show was canceled. Most people just don’t get it.

17. Dressing up as a famous villain is always a good idea. But not the Joker. That’s been done. By Dwight. Dressing up as Dwight… good stuff.

18. If you’re the DJ for the Halloween party, go ahead and play Thriller. But other than that, please don’t subject people to endless versions of the Monster Mash.

19. Try and avoid Renaissance themed outfits. It just says so much about you. Lancelot was a pansy.

20. If there’s an In-N-Out near you, go there after the party – in costume. An animal style cheeseburger is even better in a bee costume.

21. If you have an elaborate hair-do, remember you will ALWAYS need twice as many bobby-pins as you own.

22. Don’t drink the punch. Or eat the jello eyeballs. But compliment the person that thought it was a good idea to spend two hours making them. They need all the support they can get.

23. Halloween parties never hit their peak until around 10 o’clock, roughly 20 minutes after everyone has dragged their friends out on the floor to do all the Thriller moves. But show up on time anyway, it’s polite to your host.

24. If you’re over the age of 12, don’t trick or treat. It just ends up being awkward, and your friends will resent you for suggesting it.

25. And finally…. the guy that dresses up as Edward Scissorhands always wins best costume.